Next week, a new chapter

I've been listening to the Lumineers today. Wonderful band. It all started with listening to Tigers in the Sky, equally wonderful. And I have to say, while Spotify is great, I still love listening to music on youtube. I have found some great musicians on there over the years. I've missed it. Hollow Caves just started playing - wow. 

It's the last week of my long holiday. How am I feeling?, you may ask. I don't really know to tell you the truth. I feel excited, hopeful, a tad bit nervous. Let me rewind for you. 

A year ago, I came back from 4 months travelling abroad. I had decided to become a teacher earlier in 2016 so quit my job after being rejected from a few teacher training courses and went travelling to clear my head. When I got back, I got a job in a school and decided to have another go at those applications. Rejection should never mean defeat. A year later, I start my teacher training course next week. Monday to be precise: it's Induction day. 

I'm 27 years old. Some may say it's late to begin studying again. To have another go at what I want my career to be. But I really don't. There is something quite wonderful about having another go - an appreciation of learning and doing your best. But also, it may be a manifestation of something you've always wanted. I'll rewind a little more to this one memory. 

I was 15 years old (perhaps 16), looking at studying abroad and so ordered all these prospectus' from UK Universities. It had been known that I was a really good student, I had a knack for maths and sciences, and so obviously I was to consider medicine or science courses. But I sneaked in a 'How to become a teacher" prospectus and chatted to my maths teacher at school about what her thoughts were about her job. I was bloody 16 and wanted to be a teacher then. The thing is, everyone has an opinion about teaching and it clouded my judgment and I pursued something else, albeit something I was still interested in and could have been a viable path. 

So perhaps, there are signs everywhere. You just have to look a bit closer and dig deep. We quieten so many of our desires, listen to others instead, and trot along with a bobbing head. Saying yes is very different to bobbing your head. I feel like I've bobbed my head many times, agreeing that 'sure that sounds good', but this time, I'm giving a very firm and positive yes. 

So, I'm looking forward to this new chapter of my life. I'm looking forward to becoming a student again, to taking on more than I can handle but handling it oh so well, owning it like a boss. 

What are you looking forward to? 

A few things to do before I actually start: 

Write a manifesto for myself 
Eat chocolate chip pancakes
Read those articles 
Get new glasses 
Get a notebook and my pencil case sorted
Go to Hackney City Farm 
Run a bath 

Love,

Sofia 

Hello again,

A few years back, I used to write often. Even though I can't remember what exactly about, I remember feeling content and at ease after every time. And I use to do it here. It might not be the most fantastical of places to write, it's not a page, it's not for a particular purpose, but somehow, when I put my fingers on this keyboard and see this specific layout, I feel it. The nostalgia, the honesty, the clarity. And so, here I am again.

Something that always stuck with me was this wonderful quote by C.S. Lewis - I keep coming back to it time after time - "Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different". The sad thing is when I look back, even though my life has been filled with wonderful memories and experiences, I've done a terrible job of reflecting on it, recording it, remembering it. And so, indeed, when I look back, everything is somewhat different, but I forget how.

This space - This must be the place - is an attempt of mine to collect the thoughts, memories, experiences that have shaped my life. It's not about making it beautiful, doing it for a particular reason, for a specific audience, but instead, for it to be a way to connect with myself and others out there who like this sort of thing.

Welcome. And hello again, if you're returning.

Love,
Sofia